Well, it is time to say goodbye.
After a month on HBO Max, the “Mortal Kombat” movie will depart the streaming service May 24.
Those who still want to watch the action flick should check local listings as some theaters will still have it.
It’s funny but while watching it again to put this list together, it’s increasingly odd how much some people hated it. It’s perfect Mortal Kombat, enough gore and battle to please any fighting game fans.
So, as we say goodbye to HBO Max access, we at EVG wanted to highlight some of the best lines in the roughly two-hour movie, in no particular order. Some are funny. Some are important to the movie’s mythology. Spoiler alert: Kano steals the show.
“There is no prophecy. Hanzo is a ghost. I killed him centuries ago.”
“I am no longer Bi-Han. I am Sub-Zero.”
A conversation early on sets the stage for what will likely be a multi-movie tale. The Mortal Kombat tournaments need a villain and Sub-Zero is the perfect foil for Scorpion and the “good guys.”
“Did you make that last part up? It sounds like you made it up and, look, they spelled it wrong.”
Cole Young to Sonya Blade after she explains the mechanics of the Mortal Kombat tourney and what the mark on his chest means. Cole didn’t get too many funny lines but this is a good one.
“Kano wins.” Kano – obviously.
“Flawless victory.” Kung Lao.
“Get over here!” Scorpion.
“Fatality.” Liu Kang.
This series of quotes were well placed homages to the video game series. It is subtle and it is not over saturated in the movie. Still, you can’t have a Mortal Kombat movie without a nod to the video games.
Sonya trying to convince Kano to help her find the temple. She offers him $2 million for his help.
“That’s good. You live in this sh*thole and you got $2 million? Pig’s a*s.”
“I have lived here my whole life you piece of sh*t you watch your mouth. $2 million.”
Kano: “3 million.”
Cole: “You’re gonna give that guy $3 million?”
Sonya: “F*ck no. I live in this sh*thole you think I’ve got $3 million?”
Beautiful symmetry here. Sonya sure knew how to get under Kano’s skin and, eventually, she gets out of paying him the money in her own way. Thank you, garden gnomes.
“OK, that’s far enough M.C. Hammer.”
“Hey, David Copperfield, hang on. Just teach me how to do that.”
A couple of Kano one-liners when he first met Liu Kang. They didn’t get off on the right foot and never left that same foot.
“Hey, hold on. What about me, Gandalf, what does my fortune cookie say?”
Kano (we told you he was great in this!) to Raiden when he first meets him. Let’s just say Raiden didnt react like he wanted him to and struck him down.
“All right, just circling back on those superpowers. i think i get it now. It’s kind of like a box of chocolates . You never know what you’re going to get. Is it going to be fireballs? is it going to be lightning? Huh? Could be sh*t. Could be, uh, a frisbee hat, you know? No offense, whoever you are.”
I wonder if they had the movie “Forrest Gump” in this universe. Anyway, Kano sure knows how to make a first impression, doesn’t he? This was essentially his opening line to Kung Lao.
“That was good stuff. Really great. You know, maybe your arcana is getting your a*s kicked by a hat.”
Kano to Cole as he’s trying to figure out his power after he gets beaten by Kung Lao
“That was it wasn’t it? You all saw that. A laser beam. Better than fireballs, you p*ssy.”
Ah, Kano just can’t leave well enough alone. He gets his power but manages to fire off a one-liner in the process.
Did you see a guy down there. Complete fucking a*shole. Answers to Kano. Yeah, he’s the reason I live in an iron lung. He’s a lowlife piece of sh*t scumbag. You’re going to love him.
Kabal to Shang Tsung when the evildoers are working on a plan to take over Earth.
“Look, I just want to get us out of here. F*ck another four-armed monster showing up.”
Cole’s wife, Allison, to her daughter as they pack up their belongings thinking they’d be on the run soon.